"Am I Real?" by Dr. Zeus

Every day upon TV,
they have shows called "reality"
I don't do these things I muse,
which makes me just a bit confused.

I've never sung to win a prize,
I've never eaten reindeer's eyes.
I've never lived with total jerks,
except for those I see at work.

I do not have to walk a beam,
to get my lunch and some ice cream.
I don't sell t-shirts on the street,
to get a job in Donald's suite.

I've not been stranded with a tribe,
and had to outwit and survive.
I've never had my ride pimped out,
by burly men who yell and pout.

Is this what I'm supposed to do?
I swear I did not have a clue!
And If I don't then am I real?
Am I the one whose life's surreal?

I must find a chance right now,
to walk cross-country with a cow.
Should I get my look redone,
or maybe pick my Dad's new son?

There must be a way for me,
to make my life just like TV.
My old ways I will now doff
or else I might be voted off!