Ramblings Episode 389: House Cleaning

We’re trying to fill up the Salvation Army store. Also, granulated ice. #RoaUMP


Run time: 8:03

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Ramblings Episode 388: Fallout Shelter

I found a new addicting game to play on my phone. #RoaUMP


Run time: 17:52

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Ramblings Episode 387: Pirate Carols 3

Captain Gizmo returns for another piratey batch o’ Christmas cheer! #RoaUMP


Run time: 9:42

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For more piratey Christmas goodness check out Pirate Carols and Pirate Carols 2.

Pirate Lads Are Coming to Town

Ye better not fight
Ye better not hide
Better to run
I’m tellin’ ye why
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town

We’ll search the town once,
we’ll check it twice
Gonna find loot all sparkly and nice
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town

We’ll find where ye are hiding
All yer high-priced stuff
We might e’en grab a wench or two
We can never get enough

O! Ye better not fight
Ye better not hide
Better to run
I’m tellin’ ye why
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town

Muskets a-fire
Cutlass a-swing
Many a lass give plenty a scream
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town

Give us yer gold
Silver, too
Wouldn’t say no to a gem or two
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town

We’ll find where ye are hiding
All yer high-priced stuff
We might e’en grab a wench or two
We can never get enough

Ye better not fight
Ye better not hide
Better to run
I’m tellin’ ye why
Pirate Lads are comin’ to town


Let it Blow! Let it Blow! Let it Blow!

Oh the weather outside is frightful
but the grog be so delightful
and since we've no place to go
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow

It doesn't show signs of stopping
And the sails be always popping
The boys be hunkered down below
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow

When it’s finally time for watch
How I’ll hate going out in the storm
But as long as the rum is near
All the night long I’ll be warm

The deck is pitching madly
And we watch the waves break wildly
As long as we’ve ports to go
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow

Oh the weather outside is frightful
but the grog be so delightful
since we've no place to go
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow

It doesn't show signs of stopping
And the sails are always popping
The boys be hunkered down below
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow

When it’s finally time for watch
How I’ll hate going out in the storm
But as long as the rum is near
All the night long I’ll beOh the weather outside is frightful
but the grog be so delightful
since we've no place to go
let it blow, let it blow, let it blow


You’re a mean one, Captain Hook

You’re a mean one, Captain Hook
You’re slippery as cold steel
You be as cuddly as a cannon
You’re charming as an eel
Captain Hook
You’re a rotten ship with a barnacled keel

You’re a robber, Captain Hook
Ye hate an empty hold
Ye like lots of loot and gems
You’re stingy and you’re cold
Captain Hook
Ye wouldn’t share a single
Dubloon of gold

You’re a vile one
Captain Hook
Ye have weevils in your smile
You have half the tender sweetness of that ticking crocodile, Captain Hook
Given the choice,
I’d take the ticking crocodile

You’re a foul one, Captain Hook
Ye hunt lost boys on a whim
Ye sharpen up your hook
Hope to rip them limb from limb
Captain Hook
You be a three-decker whale fat sandwich,
With ground up fish sauce

You are ruthless, Captain Hook
You’re the king of dog-eat-dog
Your crew be just as brutal, ye all deserve to rot
Captain Hook
Your ship be an appalling wreck
Overflowing with the most disgraceful
Assortment of rubbish humanity imaginable,
Someday you’ll be lined up and shot!

You’re a slime ball, Captain Hook
Like a hand full of nauseous slugs
Ye run a crooked ship
full of hairy rats and bugs
Captain Hook
The three best words that best describe you,
Be as follows, and I quote
Skewed!
Rude!
Crude!

Ramblings Episode 386: The Masters

I realized that newer readers probably aren’t reading the classic greats of sci-fi. #RoaUMP


Run time: 17:35

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Ramblings Episode 385: Fooled

My dad liked to pull the wool over my eyes at Christmas time. #RoaUMP


Run time: 11:55

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Ramblings Episode 384: Christmas Cards

I’m a little surprised people still send these things. #RoaUMP


Run time: 6:51

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Ramblings Episode 383: Star Wars-The Force Awakens

My long-winded ramble about the latest installment. #RoaUMP


Run time: 32:31

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Ramblings Episode 382: Snow Shame

It’s odd that the warm weather has me feeling odd about preparing for winter weather. #RoaUMP


Run time: 6:26

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Ramblings Episode 381: The Wookie Rookie Podcast

I’m following the experiences of a new viewer of the Star Wars saga. #RoaUMP


Run time: 14:51

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Ramblings Episode 380: Elf On A Shelf

I’m glad I don’t have to get this creative every day of the Christmas season. #RoaUMP


Run time: 12:26

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Ramblings Episode 379: ID2 vs The New Trek

Once again similar movie trailers evoke different reactions. #RoaUMP


Run time: 11:02

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Ramblings Episode 378: Lasik

My experience of getting surgery on my eyes. #RoaUMP


Run time: 21:24

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Ramblings Episode 377: Krispy Kreme

One of my absolute favorite donuts. #RoaUMP


Run time: 6:48

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Ramblings Episode 376: The Expanse

I watched the first episode of this new SyFy series.#RoaUMP


Run time: 19:01

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Ramblings Episode 375: Tablet Woes

I talk about the declining performance of my Android tab. Also, comics. #RoaUMP


Run time: 8:45

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Ramblings Episode 374: Looking Ahead

A milestone on the horizon has me planning sooner than I had thought. #RoaUMP


Run time: 8:38

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Ramblings Episode 373: Hardcore History

Dan Carlin’s take on times we’d rather not live through. #RoaUMP


Run time: 10:30

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Ramblings Episode 372: Musical Weekend

We saw some interesting live performances. #RoaUMP


Run time: 9:36

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Ramblings Episode 371: The Man Cave

Come along for the five cent video tour. #RoaUMP


Run time: 13:40

Ramblings Episode 371: Mistborn

Thoughts about a new-to-me fantasy series. #RoaUMP


Run time: 21:23

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Ramblings Episode 370: Unlikely Battles

I compare two movie trailers that have good guys fighting good guys. #RoaUMP


Run time: 6:56

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Ramblings Episode 369 – Christmas Decorating

Mine is done for this year, but I don’t do as much as I used to. #RoaUMP


Run time: 14:09

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Ramblings Episode 368 – Missed It, By That Much

A Tuesday-that-feels-like-Monday ramble, some of which was inaccurate. #RoaUMP


Run time: 9:26

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