Santa Scrooge

A no-so-dramatic reading can be heard by clicking the play button.




'Twas a month after Christmas and all through my home,
not a creature was stirring. I was alone.

Up late at my Xbox I sat playing games,
When I heard an odd noise that I could not name.

From 'cross the hall the sound came again,
and I knew I should check if it's a foe or a friend.

In my stocking clad feet I snuck though the house
Making less noise than even a mouse.

As I peeked 'round the corner I saw standing there,
An old man by the mantle with a shock of white hair.

He wore red velvet unmarked with black soot,
and he had no belly that jiggled or shook.

Up on his head was a short stove-pipe hat,
and he bent his lean body as he cracked his sore back.

I gave a small jerk as I knew who it was
Santa Scrooge was here to help out the Claus.

With a brief "Ho, Ho, Humbug" he turned to his work,
And went looking for presents thier owners forsook.

He looks for those gifts that came Christmas morn
But now sit abandoned, lost and forlorn.

He takes back the gifts to Santa you see,
Kind of a yule tide recycling.

Once he was done with his rounds though the houses,
He would return to Santa the books and the blouses.

All of the things he gathered today
would be refurbished and then put away.

But come next December when Christmas time reigns,
These gifts would be brought out and given again.

Scrooge just doesn't take them, that's stealing you see.
So he replaces the gifts with stuff no one needs.

He came to a paint set that sat on the floor.
It had been for Laura, but played with no more.

His fingers they scrabbled and picked up the gift,
Then he fished in his bag and a twist tie he left.

He moved through the house, making his swaps.
A pin for a CD, a stick for a watch.

Each purloined present went into his bag,
and in its place he left lint or a rag.

When he was done he returned to his start,
raised his hand as to knock and the wall split apart.

He walked through the wall and climbed in his cart,
where two very strong steeds were waiting to start.

And as the walls closed again and repaired the split,
He gave a great shout (Next!) and a crack of his whip.

And I heard him exclaim as he rode down the lane,
"Ho, Ho, Humbug to all, and I'll come back again!"